The Day-To-Day Life Of The Fearsome Five

Chapter 10: Inspired By Community

It was a quiet, dark night in the St Canard zoo, all of the animals peacefully resting. Out of the shadows, a lone figure emerges, trenchcoat and fedora completely hiding his identity (or would, if it wasn't for the oversized beak and brightly-colored jester hat).

The figure surveys the slumbering beasts, holding up a much smaller figure in a matching trenchcoat, a high-pitched voice squeaking; So, whaddya think, Bink?

The mysterious figure grins, moonlight reflecting off his teeth, as he answers in a menacing voice; "Perfect."

The sun was high in the sky, signaling a time when any respectable supervillain would be in bed. Instead, four very disgruntled criminals were trudging up to an archway that proudly displayed the words 'SC Zoo' in overdone gold lettering.

"Chuckles better have a good reason for makin' us come out here." Negaduck growled, glaring at the sign.

"A-a-at least it's a weekend, so there won't be any people." Bushroot said nervously, looking behind himself every five seconds. He was much more powerful in bright sunlight, and Darkwing usually only came out at night; despite both these things, being out and about during the day made him nervous. "W-well, except for the workers, maybe..."

<Oh, don't worry, Bushbrain!> A voice rang out over the Zoo announcement system, causing the four villains to jump. <I already took care of them.>

"Quackie? What are you doing?" Megavolt asked, turning in a circle. He frowned at all the empty cages. "Uh, aren't zoos supposed to have animals?"

"The St Canard Zoo normally hosts a large variety of fauna from around the world." Liquidator confirmed, his salesman tone strangely absent. "From the three-tone macac to the seven clawed rhinoceros, and even a few Blue Crested Bloodnets!"

The others stared at him. The aquatic dog scowled. "I'm not all business and water, ya know. Jack can have a psychology thing, but I'm not allowed to have a interest in animals?"

"Gee, when you put it like that..." Megavolt mumbled, not noticing Bushroot's snickers. "Sorry, Likky."

Liquidator looked serious for about three more seconds, then chuckled. "Nah, I'm just kidding. I did a promo here once, and there was this hot zookeeper that just loved to talk shop."

Bushroot's snickering was replaced by a glare. A loud peal of laughter rang out of the speakers. >I'm glad everybody's having such a good time! But we're getting off track, Mack.<

"You've got about seven minutes to explain what's going on here." Negaduck growled, pulling a chainsaw seemingly from thin air.

>What's going on...< Quackerjack laughed as Lego gates slammed over the archway, covering the fence surrounding the zoo. One of the cages burst open, revealing a large pile of guns. Quackerjack stepped over them, grinning as he casually twirled a rifle. "Is game night."

"Ten out ten doctors say this is a horrible, horrible idea." Liquidator whimpered, eyes darting between the toymaker's maniac grin and Negaduck's growing smile. "Actually, make that ten out of five doctors."

"Oh, relax guys; they're paintball guns." Quackerjack rolled his eyes. "Now, everyone gets five minutes to arm up and run off to claim a part of the zoo. Then," he cocked his gun, "IT'S PLAAAAAYTIME!"

"A rhinoceros at City Hall, penguins in the Library, a leopard at the Ice Cream Parlor on sixth!" Darkwing rambled, driving the Ratcatcher. "What, is there a new tarzan-themed villain?"

"Don't forget the meerkats at the docks, DW." Launchpad shuddered in the sidecar. "Though I'd definitely like to forget it. At least we know where they came from, thanks to that police report."

"But why would anyone want to-" Darkwing cut himself off as they drove past the police station, parking to stare at the single most colorful duck he'd ever seen, being led into the building by uniformed officers. The guy was a mess of random splotches of paint, covering every inch of his clothes, feathers, even his beak. It took Darkwing a second to realize that the guy was, "Quackerjack?!"

The deranged duck pouted, holding up Me Banana Brain as well as he could while in handcuffs. "Next year, we're sticking to hide-and-seek."