Thunder Branch

Chapter 1: Art Made With AI, Meant To Represent The Kids

Chapter 2: A Little Salty

Dolores: You know, it’s fine to admit you were wrong.

Camilo, sipping his drink after accidentally adding salt to it: I just like the way it tastes.

Chapter 3: Temperamental

Pepa: When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Pepa lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the person who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get mí sobrina Isabela to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!

Camilo: Ay, Mamí, chill.

Pepa: [blizzard]

Chapter 4: Hot 'N Cold

Pepa, wiping tears from her eyes: If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, it’s meant to be…

Felix: I’m literally just going to the market.

Chapter 5: Advice

Dolores: H-how do you ask someone out?

Felix: Well, first–

Pepa: Don't ask your Papí, mija, he asked me out while I was having a panic attack because 'rain is romantic'.

Camilo: ...And you said yes?

Camilo: Don't get me wrong, I'm glad you did, I wouldn't be around otherwise.

Camilo: But, seriously Mamí, you're better than that.

Felix: Hey!

Felix: I mean, she is, but still!

Chapter 6: I Love Camilo's Door So Much, He's A Gremlin Child

Dolores: We all have our demons.

Antonio, pointing to Camilo: This one’s ours.

Camilo: [grins menacingly]

Chapter 7: Child

Camilo: I have a problem.

Antonio: If it's harder than 2+2, I can't help.

Chapter 8: Pep Talk

The kids are about to do something dangerous

Dolores: Shouldn’t someone give a pep talk?

Camilo: Go ahead.

Dolores: Me? Oh, uh...

Dolores: Be careful. Don’t die.

Camilo: [barely holds back a laugh]

Antonio: Sounds pretty inspiring to me. Let's do this!

Chapter 9: Parenting

Felix, walking in with a bucket of oatmeal on his head: The saying “it is better to beg forgiveness than to ask permission” no longer applies to Camilo.

Pepa: I thought we agreed it didn't apply to him years ago?

Felix: Yeah, well now it REALLY doesn't.

Chapter 10: Would Totally Happen

Dolores, at Camilo's funeral: I need a moment with him.

Everyone else at the funeral: Of course. [leaves]

Dolores, leaning over Camilo's coffin: Okay, listen here you little shit. I can still hear the blood rushing through your veins and your neurons sparking, I know you’re not dead.

Camilo, sitting up in the coffin: Yeah, no shit.

Camilo: Also, what the fuck?

Chapter 11: Instructions

Pepa: We left instructions for everyone while we're gone.

Camilo: Mine just says "Camilo no."

Felix: We want you to apply it to every possible situation.

Chapter 12: Good Brother

Camilo: The odds of this happening by coincidence are vanishingly small.

Dolores: I would say infinitesimally.

Antonio: And I'd say teenily-weenily. We all know words!

Camilo: And such a big one, too! Give me five, hermanito.

Chapter 13: How Relationships Work

Dolores: Since we're in a relationship now, your clothes are my clothes too. Don't ask me why I have your shirt on, this is our shirt.

Mariano: Fine, but when I come strutting in with your fuzzy socks I don't want to hear shit.

Chapter 14: Overdramatic Little Gremlin, Ain't He?

Camilo: The universe is cold and unfeeling. The only constant is chaos.

Antonio: What's wrong with him?

Dolores: He was caught pretending to be different people to get free samples from that chocolate-chip pancakes place again.

Chapter 15: Good Brother..?

Dolores: Sorry I'm late, I was doing stuff.

Camilo: YOU PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKING STAIRS!

Pepa and Felix, gasping: Dolores!

Dolores: Wha– I didn't–

Camilo: Nah, I'm just messing with you.

Camilo: She was just making out with her boyfriend.

Pepa, head in her hands: Camilo...

Camilo: But see how much worse it could've been? You can't really be mad at her for being late now, right?

Everyone: [stares at Camilo]

Camilo: I... sense I miscalculated somewhere.

Chapter 16: His Entire Personality, Again

Camilo: I've never encountered a problem that can't be solved by a spontaneous musical number and a liiiittle bit of identity theft.

Chapter 17: Computers Started Being Sold In 1946, This Is Possible

Camilo, under his breath: I'm in.

Dolores, throwing a pillow at him: STOP SAYING THAT EVERY TIME YOU LOG ON TO THE COMPUTER.

Chapter 18: Shapeshifter Problems

Villager: Look, do I consider myself attractive? Yes. But would I have sex with my clone? Also yes.

Camilo: [immediately walks the other direction as fast as he possibly can]

Chapter 19: This One's Actually Kinda Bad

Antonio: What if people had food names and food had people names?

Camilo: Hey, spaghetti, we’re having Antonio for dinner.

Dolores: What is wrong with you people?

Camilo: Shut up, chocolate.

Dolores: ...

Dolores: Mamí! Papí!

Camilo: Wait, no–

Chapter 20: Dolores Is All Powerful

Dolores: Camilo, what are you doing?

Camilo: [shaking a lizard-shaped piggy bank] I’m just trying to figure out how much change I have inside.

Dolores, annoyed by the sound: You could always take it out and count it.

Camilo: Where’s the fun in that?

Dolores: The fun is that I don't tell Tia Julieta that you're the one stealing the leftovers every night.

Camilo: ...

Camilo, setting his piggy bank down: Sounds like a blast.

Chapter 21: His Gift Is Actually Really Dark

Pepa, confused and exasperated: Mijo, how do you plan on telling a jaguar to go vegan?

Antonio: Politely.

Chapter 22: Mama Bear But With Lightning

Villager: Man, they look like a real handful. How do you deal with them?

Pepa, watching Antonio screaming, Camilo trying to set a sleeping Felix on fire, and Dolores choking on air because she heard something shocking: They are perfect, angelic sweethearts, and if you ever say anything bad about them ever again I will hunt you down and–

Chapter 23

Camilo: Next time I'm at the pet store, I'm gonna take a hamster and drop it in the scorpion cage. I wanna see what a hamster's face looks like when it goes, "oh, fuck."

//Across town

Dolores: Papí, we need to go home now.

Felix: But we just barely started shopping, mija!

Dolores: I know, Papí, but Camilo made a dumb joke and now Antonio's crying.

Dolores: And now Camilo's crying because he made Antonio cry.

Thunder rumbles in the distance

Dolores: And now Mamí's crying because both of them are crying and they're too upset to explain why.

Felix: ...

Felix: Mija, I love your Mamí and hermanos very much, but have I ever told you how much I value your emotional stability?

Dolores, who once had a breakdown and blackmailed half the town into playing the quiet game for a week: I am the calm one, aren't I? <3

Chapter 24: I Don't Know What To Call This One

Guard: State your name, rank, and intention.

Camilo: Camilo, Madrigal, fun.

Chapter 25: Dude, She Already Knows And Has Judged You

Camilo: I sort of did something and I need some advice, but I don't want a lot of judgment and criticism.

Dolores: And you came to me?

Chapter 26: Tell Me I'm Wrong

Dolores/half the family: Some people say that I have a god complex. I’d like to think that I’m a complex god.

Chapter 27: Mama's Boy :)

Camilo: Mamí, have I ever told you that I love you with my whole heart?

Pepa: For the love of all that is holy, I am not taking you to another town just to have McDonalds!

Camilo: Mean.

Chapter 28: One Of My Favs

Mariano: Dolores! I can't do this stupid math!

Dolores: What’s the math problem?

Mariano: Well, we have to add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and hope we don’t multiply.

Camilo, covering Antonio's ears, while Dolores runs away blushing: Not going to lie, dude, that was hella smooth.

Chapter 29: Good Brothers (Or At Least They're Trying)

Camilo: Okay, I’m going to get the wedding cake.

Antonio: Perfect, while you do that I’ll check on the ring bear.

Camilo: ...

Camilo: You mean ring bearER, right?

Antonio: ...

Camilo: Look me in the eyes and tell me you are not going to bring a dangerous wild animal to our hermana's wedding.

Antonio: But he asked so nicely!

Chapter 30: Outsider POV

Camilo: [takes a free sample twice using his Gift]

Camilo: Robbery, Fraud, and Identity Theft. I am a Rebel.

Shop owner 1: He gets this big grin on his face and it makes us feel so good about our cooking, and he's always watching our children for free, so we just let him take as much as he wants.

Shop owner 2: Don't tell him, though, we don't want to spoil his little game.

Dolores, back at the house: [giggling]

Camilo: What's so funny, sis?

Dolores: N-nothing! [squeak]